Let’s cancel this trashy show

It’s Wednesday. There are 69 (nice) days until the general election. Brain worm dude can still do the funniest thing ever, Jack Smith ain’t afraid of SCOTUS and MVP goes on offense over Project 2025.

Be advised: This newsletter uses profanity. It allows us to react appropriately to that Trump-at-Arlington story.

Note: Ugh, Sexy Patriots. Ugh. By now you’ve all probably seen this super gross story about Trump’s campaign getting into a physical confrontation at Arlington National Cemetery with someone who tried to stop his disgusting thumbs-up shit-eating-grin photo-op. Of course Trump, who dodged the draft and refers to our troops as “suckers” and “losers,” says the Arlington official was having a “mental health episode” and is a “disgrace” to the cemetery they were trying to protect.. Of course he’s also the kind of dirtbag who would get in a fight at Arlington, so maybe we don’t take his word on this. But our question for him and his supporters is this — how much more? What’s next? Is anything sacred?

You just took your gutter politics and bullshit into freaking Arlington National Cemetery. That’s hallowed ground. You’ve defiled our Capitol. You’ve shaken our election systems. You trash our juries and judges. You’ve soiled the Supreme Court. You ripped up the Constitution to make yourself a king. What’s next? How long until we turn on the news and hear That’s right, Lynn, Donald Trump has just shat on the State of Liberty’s face. We can’t explain it. We don’t even know how he got up there, but sure enough that is Donald Trump defecating on Lady Liberty’s nose. He’s giving a thumbs up and smiling. He really seems to enjoy shitting on this beacon of hope and freedom. Back to you, Lynn!

It’s time for this nonstop nonsense to stop, and Kamala Harris is the person to stop it. Let’s cancel this trashy show. We’ve seen enough. Y’all have a blessed day. More: NPR

Note two: Brian Kemp, who Trump has been viciously attacking for four years now, is throwing a fundraiser for Trump in Atlanta on Thursday. So yeah, he sucks like all the rest. But we always suspected as much. More: ABC

Note three: It’s been just more than a month since MVP became our presumptive nominee and it is just freaking insane how much the map has changed since then. Yesterday, the Cook Political Report made some big moves, including moving North Carolina from Lean R to Toss up. They also moved Minnesota and New Hampshire to Likely D. Take nothing for granted. Fight for every vote. But also, hell yeah. More: The Hill

Note four: Vice President Harris and Gov. Walz are going to sit for an interview with CNN on Thursday. Can the press stop crying now? It ain’t like they know what Trump’s healthcare plan is and he’s only been running for 20 fucking years. More: The Hill

Note five: There was a brief moment when we really felt sorry for the dumbasses who spend money on this shit. But that moment has long passed. Remember when Republicans used to talk about the dignity of the office of the presidency?

Note six: So we are late to this story and it deserves far more attention that what we’re giving it here, but what Attorney General Ken Paxton is doing in Texas these days is straight-up fucking fascism. Merrick Garland and DOJ need to get involved now and in a big damn way. More: CBS

Note seven: We’ve got Labor Day plans for the Blue Team courtesy of Eugene Daniels — MVP will be in Detroit and then in Pittsburgh with President Biden, Gov. Walz and First Lady Walz will be in Milwaukee and the Notorious D.O.U.G. will be in Newport News, Va. Sorry, we’re just really big Doug fans these days. Also, can you believe Labor Day is already here?!

Note eight: It’s crazy the way a former Republican U.S. Senator was made president of a major state university, robbed the joint blind and just walked away. Actually, that sounds exactly like something a Republican U.S. Senator would do. More: WTSP

Note nine: There are some stories that are so far-fetched and so goddamn crazy sounding that there’s just no way they could be true. This story about Melania plagiarizing more shit isn’t one of them. More: HuffPost

Note 10: Good lord. Someone tell Jaunty Doodybreath (JD) Vance this is part of why we all think he’s so fucking weird…

Note 11: Yesterday we told y’all that Trump put RFK Jr. on his transition team. He also put Tulsi Gabbard on there. So yeah, we either win or we all learn to speak Russian and dumbass. More: HuffPost

Note 12: Hey so we haven’t talked enough about Senate races. There are a ton of important ones to choose from, but today we want to point your attention to Angela Alsobrooks in Maryland. A new AARP poll just showed her tied with former Republican Gov. Larry Hogan, and we don’t need to tell y’all how badly we need this seat. If you can help, please do. More: AARP, Angela Alsobrooks

Note 13: Are you registered to vote in North Carolina? Well check and make sure. Then check again. More: NC News Online

Note 14: If you need hope right now — and hopefully you’re doing ok in that department these days — just remember that Oasis is reuniting. If those two assholes can get together, anything is possible. More: Pitchfork

Note 15: We’re gonna talk about this new ad in the news section, but we want to make sure everyone sees it…

Note 16: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson says she is “concerned” about the broken SCOTUS’s immunity decision. Yeah, that makes a bunch of us. More: CNN

Note 17: Good news, everybody! It looks like we flipped the mayor’s office in Tulsa with two Democrats advancing to the general election. Good job, Tulsa! More: KJRH

Note 18: We love this — Swifties for Kamala raised more than $100,000. They even had Carole King and Elizabeth Warren get on it. Now it’s just missing one more person… More: Variety

Note 19: For today’s Happy Ending, we don’t need to say anything. We just want to show you this and say let’s fucking go…

Note 20: And on that exciting note, let’s go do some news! We sure hope this week is going great for you. We also hope Donald Trump doesn’t poop on the Statue of Liberty. Love y’all!

LOLOL!!!

So we’ve been saying for a while now that it would be the funniest thing to ever happen if RFK Jr. ended up playing spoiler for the wrong candidate. And then that’s what started to happen. The brain worm asshole has been largely funded by pro-Trump rich people and he dropped out because he was taking more from Trump than Harris in swing states. But — TWIST — it looks like these morons pulled the ripcord too late and now he’s stuck on those ballots anyway. So yeah, the dog-eating, bear-corpse-desecrating, vaccine-hating, brain-worm-having scumbag who backed Trump this week will still very much be on the ballot in Wisconsin, Michigan, Nevada and North Carolina. LOLOL!!!

More: NBC

Git his ass, Jack

Yesterday we told y’all that Special Counsel Jack Smith had appealed the dismissal down in Florida. Well he was just getting started. On Tuesday, Smith charged Trump under a superseding indictment. There are no new charges, but this new indictment — brought forth by a new grand jury — is designed to fit the bullshit SCOTUS ruling that tried to make Trump a king. Trump absolutely lost his shit upon this happening, smashing down the all caps button and screaming into the void. We’re damn glad to see Jack Smith ain’t quitting. Trump attacked our Capitol, and we want accountability.

More: NPR

Let’s go!!!

So MVP’s team is back on offense today. First, Harris and Tim Walz are kicking off a bus tour in Georgia in Southeast Georgia. Second, that ad we showed y’all earlier about Project 2025? Well they’re going really big with that one with a $370 million campaign that will air the ad in swing states and in Palm Beach just to fuck with Trump. According to the campaign, “that means every single day between now and Election Day, battleground voters will be seeing and hearing from us on Trump’s Project 2025.”

More: NBC

Today’s clips

A conservative nonprofit group plans to spend $10 million in the hopes of chipping away at Vice President Kamala Harris' key base of Black voter support by criticizing the White House's proposal, which it postponed earlier this year, to ban menthol cigarettes. More: NBC

Former President Barack Obama offered a note of caution to Democrats buzzing over Vice President Kamala Harris’ campaign, telling donors on Martha’s Vineyard Monday night that the party needs to ramp up its focus – and spending – on down-ballot races across the country. More: CNN

Sen. JD Vance of Ohio, the Republican vice presidential nominee, attacked teachers who don’t have children in remarks in 2021 that resurfaced Tuesday. More: NBC