Greg the Gasser’s bad day
It’s Wednesday. There are 370 days until the midterm elections and SIX DAYS UNTIL THIS YEAR’S ELECTIONS! Zo gets the O treatment, the Senate finds a nut and Marge vs. Mikey.
Be advised: This newsletter uses profanity. But at least it didn’t give some idiot a golden crown.
Note: Ya know, Sexy Patriots, there are so many assholes and villains in Trumpland that some slip through the cracks of infamy. They’re like a growth on your taint — there and making you itch and killing you without you even knowing it. That’s why we’ve been trying so hard to introduce people to Gregory “The Gasser” Bovino. People need to know about this psycho. Seriously, just look at this crazy fucking picture…
Duuuuuuude. What in the nazi asshole is happening here?! Now that’s a fella who would get caught sniffing Hitler’s undies. Like that’s a real picture of a real man in the year 2025, and he is the face and muscle of Trump’s violent and thuggish CBP raids in Los Angeles and Chicago. And yesterday he got his nazi bitch ass handed to him.
Ya see ol’ Greg the Gasser loves tear-gassing folks almost as much as he loves talking to the press and dressing like a nazi henchman. He also really, really loves violating court orders, and yesterday Judge Sara Ellis had enough. Ellis hauled Bovino into court and reminded him that tear-gassing trick-or-treating kids is fucked up and now allowed. She dragged his ass like he deserved, and fucking love every bit of it. But then it got better.
Ellis is making Bovino meet with her every day in person to make sure her orders are being followed. We assume if he doesn’t show, she’s gonna have to paddle his lil’ nazi ass. Anyway, thank you to Judge Ellis and fuck you to Greg the Gasser. Hold that L, punk motherfucker. Y’all have a blessed day.
Note two: So we have to ask — how the hell is it a ceasefire if bombs are still killing people? More: NBC News
Note three: We should probably be more worried about Trump 2028, but we’re too busy being worried about Trump 2025, Trump 2026 and Trump 2027. More: HuffPost
Note four: Yesterday we cussed Jake Tapper to hell and back because he is a total wuss who only gets tough with Democrats. Case in point, the House Oversight Chairman told Jakey it’s fine for Trump to be corrupt as hell because he does it publicly. Tapper had no follow-up. More: Mediaite
Note five: Man, we wish we were kidding about the fucking gold crown thing. Come on, South Korea!
Note six: Americans do not like Donald Trump. It’s just hard to see it because the media loves him so much. More: YouGov
Note seven: These fucking idiots are really gonna try to nullify Joe Biden’s pardons. Ok cool with us. That means Trump’s pardons won’t mean shit either and we can make sure Stephen Miller rots in a prison cell. More: CNN
Note eight: This is so goddamn funny. Not only are Trump U.S. Attorneys losing in court like a bunch of losers, but they also keep being told they’ve been illegally appointed. LOL. More: HuffPost
Note nine: Two questions — Have you voted yet and have you given to your local food pantry? People are really hurting and those seem like the two best ways to help. More: NBC News
Note 10: We are really digging Ruben Gallego’s vibes these days. Democrats need to start taking on the press. Work the refs, folks.
Note 11: We’re sending more love to Jamaica and Cuba. It’s a goddamn shame Trump didn’t use his magic sharpie to make this storm go away. More: Associated Press
Note 12: So Don Jr. is in the Middle East trashing Americans. Tapper would be losing his shit if Hunter Biden did this. More: Associated Press
Note 13: Open enrollment is here. Dog help us all. More: Associated Press
Note 14: The Ninth Circuit is going to rule on Trump’s invasion of Portland after two of his kiss-ass judges on the same court said it was no biggie. Thank goodness. More: NBC News
Note 15: We had this idea yesterday, but we’re glad to see Jimmy Kimmel is behind it. If Trump won’t take an IQ test publicly with Jasmine Crockett, then he’s a coward and a moron.
Note 16: There actually is someone more horrible and evil than Stephen Miller. His wife. More: Mediaite
Note 17: We have just never seen corruption like the Trump family’s. And we will never understand why it’s not a bigger deal to both the press and the people. More: HuffPost
Note 18: We had mostly forgotten that Kyrsten Sinema even existed. It was pretty nice. Then we learned she’s still out there and still a corrupt and soulless bucket of garbage juice. We sure hope she fucks all the way off.
Note 19: For today’s Happy Ending, we’d like to share this clip of Ta-Nehisi Coates dropping some truth. It’s not really all that happy, but it’s sure nice to hear someone else calling out the cowards.
Note 20: And on that truthful note, let’s go do some news! We sure hope y’all have a lovely Hump Day. Unless you’re Greg Bovino. But we know that dumb motherfucker can’t read. Love y’all!
The New York Slimes
We’ve seen the media treat people the way they’re treating Zohran Mamdani before. The candidate then was named Barack Obama. Basically a bunch of white reporters take a bunch of normal shit and they make it sound really foreign and scary. And that’s what Jeremy Peters and the NYT did today. In a piece that centers around anonymous “critics” of Mamdani’s education, Peters and co. suggest that Mamdani must be otherized because he knows how to accurately pronounce Haiti (for Obama, it was Iran and Iraq that he pronounced correctly and raised racist eyebrows). You might remember Peters as the guy who just wasn’t sure what Elon Musk’s politics were. There is an all-out media and Republican assault on this dude, and we have no idea if he’s going to win. But if he loses, we will sure as fuck know why and it rhymes with racism. More: New York Times
Well we’ll be damned
Yesterday the U.S. Senate did something shocking — it kinda almost stood up to Trump. In a rare and symbolic vote, senators voted 52-48 to put an end to Trump’s tariffs on Brazil. Now this won’t even get a vote in the House where Mike Little Johnson is keeping things shut down and Trumpy. But it sure as hell shows just how freaked the fuck out Republicans are about Trump’s dumb trade wars and the effect they’re having on prices. We doubt we’ll see any real courage from these punks, but we sure enjoy that it probably made Trump mad. More: The Guardian
Idiot fight!!!
It would be going too far to say that we’re cheering on Marjorie Taylor Greene. After all, she is a bigot and a moron. But goddamn we sure are enjoying watching her give Mike Little Johnson fits. On a private GOP conference call yesterday, Greene got into it with Johnson over the House not being in session. She’s also calling for abolishing the Senate filibuster to reopen the government so she still sucks. But she’s right that Republicans should be at work, and she’s right that Republicans should be finding a way to help Americans with their healthcare costs. But mostly she’s right to make Little Johnson’s life hell, and that’s the part we’re really enjoying. Still, we hate her and she can eat shit. But still, go Marge. More: New Republic
Today’s clips
After Abigail Spanberger took the stage at a campaign event Sunday afternoon here, she delivered an impassioned speech casting next week’s gubernatorial election as a chance to reject President Donald Trump and the chaos she said his administration’s policies have sowed in Virginia’s economy. More: NBC News
The White House on Tuesday fired all six members of the Commission of Fine Arts, an independent federal agency that would have reviewed President Donald Trump’s ballroom construction project, a White House official confirmed to NBC News. More: NBC News
The Department of Homeland Security has repeatedly posted misleading, mislabeled, and in at least one case digitally altered footage to promote President Donald Trump’s immigration agenda — an aggressive messaging strategy defended by the White House as engaging “banger memes,” according to a detailed Washington Post investigation published this week. More: Mediaite
A Confederate leader’s statue is back up in Washington, D.C., following President Donald Trump’s directive to restore such monuments earlier this year. More: HuffPost
The Trump administration is moving to overrule any state laws that may protect consumers’ credit reports from medical debt and other debt issues. More: Associated Press
No F*cking way is there, or was there ever, a cease fire in Gaza. Bibi is still alive.
Bovino looks like Dr. Frankenstein put him together. And, how can Sinema bully anyone, she a big nothing.