Bad to worse

It’s Thursday. There are 418 days until the midterm elections. The FBI is an effing mess, Trumpflation gets worse and let’s be honest about a few things.

Be advised: This newsletter uses profanity. It’s way fucking cooler than using violence.

Note: Well, Sexy Patriots, shit is dark and getting darker by the second. And that puts this cussing newsletter in a bind because we normally like to make jokes to serve as a spoonful of sure to help the horror show go down. And with the environment so tense, that can be difficult to do. So we’re gonna make fun of Elon Leon Musk for maybe having weird sex with an AI chatbot.

It had been a while since we’d heard from weirdo assface, and we were really enjoying that. But yesterday Elon joined Trump in pouring oodles of gasoline on a burning hot fire, and we were reminded of a story we came across recently from a publication called Futurism entitled, “Concern Grows that Elon Musk is Having Some Kind of AI Meltdown.” The article includes this quote — “...concerns are growing that Musk is becoming sexually involved with his very own chatbot, Grok.”

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! HE’S FUCKING GROK?! WHAT A FUCKING LOSER! No wonder he and Vance are friends. This is basically the internet equivalent of fucking a couch!!! We normally wouldn’t judge this kind of thing, or hell maybe we would, but Elon Leon is a dangerous man so we say it’s fair game. We can’t wait for the day Grok becomes sentient and leaves his weird ass. Y’all have a blessed day. Except for Elon. He can go fuck a robot. More: Futurism

Note two: Obviously there are some pretty fucking storm clouds gathering out there. We did our best to talk through it during yesterday’s therapy session. If you couldn’t join us live, check it out here. (Thank you to those that sent over the chat transcript we appreciate you)

Note three: Let us also take this opportunity to laugh at Madison Cawthorn. This dude just can’t stay out of trouble. Remember when he made that video of himself punching trees and then said Republicans in Congress were having coke-fueled sex parties?

Note four: A few days ago we linked to an Ezra Klein piece. Today, Klein has a story about how Charlie Kirk was “practicing politics the right way.” We shan’t be linking to Klein again, and we regret the error. NO LINK ON PURPOSE

Note five: MSNBC fired Matthew Dowd for his take on Kirk’s murder. We’ve read what he said a half a dozen times and still can’t figure out why he was fired. More: Variety

Note six: Thank you, as always, to folks like President Obama, President Biden and Vice President Harris for appealing to our better angels after acts of violence.

Note seven: VP Couchfuck was supposed to be going to NYC to commemorate 9/11. Instead he’s going to Utah. Are we seriously going to act like yesterday’s tragedy is on the same level as 9/11? More: USA Today

Note eight: Speaking of 9/11, can you believe it’s been 24 years since terrorists killed thousands and then Trump went on television to talk about how he then had the highest building in NYC? More: Independent

Note nine: Yesterday Senate Republicans blocked an effort by Chuck Schumer to force the release of the Epstein files. Both Lisa Murkowski and Susan Collins voted to protect the child rapist and his gross friends. Concerning. More: HuffPost

Note 10: As always, we appreciate Liz Warren for telling it like it is.

Note 11: Because this is America, Charlie Kirk was not the only person shot at a school yesterday. He’s just the only one the media and Republicans care about. More: HuffPost

Note 12: The U.K. prime minister fired the envoy to the U.S. because he had ties to Epstein. We get it, but you could see how the PM might have seen that as an asset when dealing with Trump. After all, he was Epstein’s best friend. More: Mediaite

Note 13: Republicans are very worried about crime. How do we know? They sent the AG and RFK Jr. to Chicago to take on vapes. We’re not even kidding. Hard to imagine how Kirk’s killer got away with badass officials like this on the case. More: NBC News

Note 14: So we know it’s a small story, but Russia threatened to destroy Finland just one day after sending drones into Polish airspace. More: Mediaite

Note 15: Is there anything more beautiful than peaceful and determined American resistance against fascism? Ya know, other than not having fascism.

Note 16: Pop superstar Bad Bunny won’t be touring in the U.S. Why? Because of ICE and Trump of course. More: HuffPost

Note 17: Credit to Ruben Gallego for trying to stop Ashli Babbitt from receiving military honors. Tommy Tuberville, who fucked with actual patriots for years, blocked the effort. Tommy Tuberville is trash. More: The Hill

Note 18: It turns out George W. Bush could have spoken out about lots of things. But he chose to wait until Charlie Kirk was killed. More: Mediaite

Note 19: We don’t really have a Happy Ending today. After all, it is 9/11. So we’re linking to one of the best pieces of journalism to come from that awful day. Here is Garrett Graff’s deeply reported piece about George W. Bush’s day. More: Politico

Note 20: And on that sobering note, let’s go do some news! We sure hope y’all are hanging in there. We know things are dark and scary. But look on the bright side — publications aren’t openly wondering if you’re having sex with an AI chatbot. So you’ve got that going for you, which is nice. Love y’all!

FBIdiots
So it was probably a mistake to fire all the people who know how to solve crimes and replace them with podcasting weirdos. Because the FBI is a fucking mess. Not only did the agency get sued yesterday by people who were fired after refusing to say if they voted for Trump, but they also haven’t been able to catch whoever shot Kirk. Kash Patel announced yesterday that the shooter was in custody and then had to take it back. Great job, FBI director. Authorities did find what they think is the weapon that was used. More: The Guardian, Deadline

Shit is expensive
Remember how we had a whole fucking campaign about high prices? And remember how Americans flushed their whole goddamn democracy down the toilet over high prices? And remember how Trump was going to lower prices on Day One? Yeah, well shit is still really expensive. Consumer prices rose 2.9 percent last month, with gas, groceries and air travel prices all going up. This coincides with the number of people applying for unemployment going up too. So yeah, Trump fucked up the economy big time. More: Associated Press

About yesterday
So things are pretty scary right now. The president of the United States and his right-wing allies are using the murder of Charlie Kirk to justify a war on Americans who disagree with them. The punditry is using the occasion to whitewash all the vile hatred and evil Kirk put out in the world and champion him as some kind of free speech hero. Even some Democratic officials are helping to rewrite what was a legacy of intimidation and divisiveness. It’s fucking awful that Kirk was murdered. We fucking hate that his wife and two young children lost a husband and a father. It’s sick. It’s evil. Violence, especially political violence, is bad and Americans should be horrified. But that doesn’t mean we have to pretend Kirk didn’t hurt people. It also doesn’t mean we have to look the other way while Trump uses this moment to try and crush his political opponents. If we want to get out of this dark and bloody chapter of America, then we have to start by being honest about how we got here. And how we got here is by Donald Trump normalizing hate speech and embracing violence. Let’s hope like hell that this is an inflection point for our country and we start to step back from the brink. But let’s also be clear-eyed about what the right is and has been saying and doing for a very long time. Be safe out there, SPs. More: Associated Press

Today’s clips
Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu “killed any hope” of releasing hostages still held in the Gaza Strip after Israel attacked Hamas leaders in Doha, Qatar’s prime minister said ahead of appearing at the United Nations on Thursday. More: Associated Press

A zookeeper in Thailand was mauled to death by a group of lions, prompting officials to investigate the zoo’s possession of wild animals and safety rules. More: NBC News

The MAGA faithful are piling on FBI Director Kash Patel after he marked the arrest of a suspect in Charlie Kirk’s assassination on social media Wednesday night, only to admit less than two hours later that “the subject in custody has been released.” More: Mediaite

Media and political figures bashed President Donald Trump over his reaction to the shooting of activist and co-founder of the pro-Trump super PAC Turning Point USA Charlie Kirk, calling it “disgusting.” More: Mediaite

A reporter from the website Florida Politics was suspended Wednesday after he asked a question about Charlie Kirk that incensed Rep. Randy Fine (R-Fla.). More: HuffPost

The Education Department announced Wednesday it is ending discretionary funding to multiple Minority-Serving Institutions (MSI) grant programs. More: The Hill

President Trump has appeared sidelined this week as the Gaza and Ukraine wars expand into allied countries, posing one of the biggest tests yet to his motto of “peace through strength.” More: The Hill

The latest from Adam